


Two Small Sheets of Paper

by lizziecrowe



Category: Law & Order: Criminal Intent
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-20
Updated: 2019-09-20
Packaged: 2020-11-02 10:29:25
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 11,854
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20714801
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lizziecrowe/pseuds/lizziecrowe
Summary: A happenstance, a discovery, a train wreck, a happily ever after.





	Two Small Sheets of Paper

**Author's Note:**

> CSI: Criminal intent is not mine by any stretch. the characters herein are creations of other people. I'm just taking them out for a spin.

**Ch.** ** 1: Two Small Sheets of Paper**

Bobby Goren listened to the tumbler click into place as he turned the key, still not quite sure how he’d been taken to this point. The day started with an interrogation- a perp with weak alibi and a weaker will broken by a simple timeline reestablishment-, coffee, paperwork… and then a call. Another case, a murder, a long night ahead, and Alex had asked him for a favor. A simple favor. And he, like the grinning dope he tended to be in regards to his partner, had said yes. And now here he stood, unlocking her front door, entering the privacy of her home for the first time feeling unwelcome.

The soft scent of flowers wafted across his senses as the door opened silently. With the flick of a switch, her living room was bathed in soft lamplight. ‘Just an overnight bag’ she says, he thought as he closed the door behind him. This was going to be interesting.

The scent followed him like a little lost puppy, and as he scanned the room, he found the source. A rather modest bouquet of baby’s breath stood in a delicate crystal vase on her desk across the room. The scent followed close behind as he moved through her home, making his way to the familiar sections he tended to inhabit when he was here.

Her kitchen was much as it always was. Pictures and postcards hung by magnets on the fridge. The dishes were clean and in the cupboards; nothing in the sink. The counter was spotless, and even her morning coffee cup was on the drying board. The pictures were all of family and friends, though none of him. He didn’t mind; he wasn’t too keen on his own picture to begin with. There were also no pictures of other men, which brought him a certain level of inner satisfaction. At least that way, he liked to tell himself, there would be no negative influences into their partnership.

Coming back to the task at hand, he strode through her living room and down the hall, making sure not to even acknowledge her bedroom door.

He clicked on the light with a slight trepidation. Women’s bathrooms had always bothered him. Every woman he’d ever gone out with had made her bathroom into a mini-salon, complete with hair care products, face creams, make-up, brushes, combs and who the heck knows what else. It never struck him as odd really, it just seemed…superfluous. How could any woman hate her appearance so much that she would seek to alter it so profoundly?

Alex’s bathroom was almost the polar opposite. Oh sure, she had shampoo and conditioner in the shower and a small container of moisturizer on the counter, but mostly it was just her hair brush, toothbrush and a single hair barrette he’d seen her use once or twice at work, especially during a windy day. He found a suitable travel bag beneath the sink and picked up her needed things absently, smiling to himself.

He moved to the at last unavoidable bedroom door, uncertain whether or not he would truly have to enter. Not that he didn’t want to by any means, it just seemed wrong. She wasn’t there to lead him in. She wasn’t there to… He pushed that thought aside as he stepped over the threshold. He was an adult. He could handle this.

Or not, he thought as he took that single step back and instead went for the clean laundry basket just inside her door. He would get what he needed from here instead.

He moved quickly down the hall, trying to fight the flush he knew was creeping up his neck. He made his way back into her living room, his keen eyes drawn immediately to her desk again. Something about those flowers attracted him. Simple baby’s breath, and yet it called to him, beckoning him closer.

His gaze paused over the desktop, glancing over the discarded Vogue magazine, the little bits of paper, the case files. He even moved a few to see what she’d been doing at home. Good grief, what was he doing? Here Alex had simply asked him to go by her apartment and pick up a small overnight bag, and he was snooping! Bobby chuckled to himself as he continued his ‘investigation’. She didn’t expect him not to, did she?

He opened the top drawer and took a quick look. Nothing special, just pens and pencils and post-its. Nothing really interesting. He closed the drawer, or at least he tried. Something was caught. He pushed the drawer in a couple times, but it wouldn’t go back in all the way. The drawer would come out completely, but it wouldn’t close. He slipped a hand into the top of the half-closed drawer to find the offensive object, and he hit what felt like a book. A book? He hadn’t seen any kind of book in the drawer. After much finagling, he managed to work the object free, and as he removed it, sure enough, it was indeed a book. It was small, almost like a diary or journal. It was leather bound and embossed with an intricate Celtic knot. Part of him wanted to open it, but he wasn’t about to invade her privacy that much.

As he moved to return the book to its hiding place, two small sheets of paper slipped from the inner cover, both slightly pink and scented with wild roses. The scent filled his nostrils long before he bent to retrieve them, but when he opened the first to read it, his heart stopped.

_My Dear Master,_

_As you commanded, I am addressing my likes and dislikes, as far being a slave. I have had a great deal of experience from my previous Mistress, but there are still several areas I would like to explore. I have arranged the information so it is easier to understand. I do hope it is helpful to you, Sir._

_My Likes_

  1. _ Rope Bondage: I do enjoy rope bondage, but only in certain positions, and usually only using woven, not braided, nylon rope, 1” thick. This lets me stay tied up for hours in complete comfort, so that I may enjoy my tortures. I enjoy being tied into kneeling, sitting, and standing positions with legs apart, together, or free to walk. I also enjoy being tied to objects, such as tables, wooden horses, and whipping benches, however these positions I cannot remain in for more than 2 hours at any given time, or I will begin cramping._
  2. _ Whipping: As I am sure you’ve already have surmised, I enjoy being whipped. I have a moderate threshold for pain, but usually once the skin is split, I hit my limit. I have had riding crops, cat-o-nine-tails, and full 8-foot bullwhips used on me, and all are fine if you would like to experiment with them. The 8-foot bullwhip was not used by my Mistress, but the Dom she was training, who had experience with it. He was very good, but he used a bit too much force and split flesh in three hits. It did feel wonderful, but he was asked never to do it again after I could not lie on my back or sit comfortably for almost 2 weeks._
  3. _ Full Domination: My definition of full domination goes beyond the bedroom. Menial tasks, being commanded outside of foreplay, as it were. Conditional servitude as well as certain types of humiliation are fine, as long as there is no violence involved. Violence is controlled at all times, is consensual at all times, and is confined to privacy, though not necessarily to the bedroom. Name-calling is fine, as well as leashes in public._
  4. _ Giving Baths: I enjoy the bathing of the ones I serve immensely. Washing hair, washing skin, and tending to the desires of my Master means more to me than most anything else. I feel as though I can cleanse my Master of his sorrows and his daily stress as the water runs over his skin._
  5. _ Knife Play: I do enjoy it very much, but I prefer it to be done only with those I trust completely, and those who know precisely what they are doing._
  6. _ Hair Pulling: I like this only under certain circumstances. When I am on my knees and my Master is behind and above me, and pulling my head back, that I love. I do like having my ponytail pulled on, but pigtails make good handholds as well. I have even been pulled on a leash by my hair, and as long as it holds tight to the majority of my hair, it’s fine._

His heart had obviously starting beating again, because it was imitating machine gun fire in his chest. What on earth was this? A joke? Satire? Could this somehow be real…? Bobby kept reading, unsure what he truly wanted the answer to be.

_My Dislikes_

  1. _ Photos: any photos that are taken of me in any position, compromising or otherwise, are to be kept private. No one other than those I designate may see any photos of me that pass between us. No exceptions whatsoever. This is one subject I do stand firm on._

The thought of Alex is such tantalizingly provocative situations frozen on paper brought a new ache to very unpartner-oriented parts of him. Bobby read on as he tried desperately not to let his arousal show, but for once his body could not be denied in regards to his partner.

_Open Areas To Explore_

  1. _ Suspension: I have never been fully suspended before. I have been tied upwards so that my arms were above my head, but my feet never stopped touching the ground._
  2. _ Latex and Gas-Mask Bondage: I have never been masked, bagged or worn full body suits of latex or plastic. The only bondage that could even qualify under this category that I have experienced happened in college in the dorm room of a very trusted friend. He wrapped me completely in Syran wrap, from head to toe. He wrapped each leg separately, then together, placed latex gloves over my hands then proceeded to wrap my arms. He wrapped my torso, letting Mistress play as he went along. When he was done, he took several Polaroid pictures for posterity, of which I received one._

Bobby had to consciously stop himself from rummaging further into the book for that photo. Instead he reached down and adjusted the steadily growing pressure in his groin.

_I hope that aids in your understanding of my experiences as well as my tastes. As far as my suspension, that happened when I was in 8th grade. I refused to tell on a friend who blew up the gym teacher’s car. The same gym teacher who had molesting girls in my grade, but no one would believe the only one who came forward, so when they investigated the car bombing, the other girls came forward, and he was given 35 years in prison without parole. However, the matter of the car bomb was still left unresolved, and for some reason, the school authorities found out that I knew who had done it. I refused to say anything, so they sent me to Juvy for an entire summer to try and “sweat” it out of me. I never gave in, so they could detain me no longer._

Well, that settles it, he thought. This was definitely his Alex talking. She’d told him about that incident before during a case, when a young man killed his father because he had assaulted and murdered his younger sister. When the boy would not make light to any information to defend his sister’s honor, Alex had told the boy about her escapades, and he had confessed, getting only mild punishment.

_I wish to apologize in advance, but this word processor would not allow me to have lower case “i” in place of “I”. It self-corrected, and I have yet to figure out how to disable that. I will do my best to find out so that it does not happen again, for I wish not to displease you, Sir._

_Good night to you, Sir. Sleep well, and dream of your hand slowly caressing my soft body, and of my screams as we make both of our fondest dreams come alive._

_Farewell, My Dear Master_

Oh good God, he thought as he slipped onto the couch, his knees giving way at last. Alex? _His_ Alex? Was she really…into this kind of thing? His mind reeled at the thought of a black cat suit, complete with ears and tail, lovingly caressing Alex’s slender curves and leaving nothing to the imagination. To see her on her knees before him, purring like the little sex kitten she was and begging him to tie her up and do horribly naughty things to her made his groin stiffen further. He quickly opened the second paper, ready for anything and still taken completely aback by the title.

_Submission_

_To some it is simply a pastime, to others it is a deplorable word that means their mind is stripped and their heart bound without hope. For me it is the most potent and wondrous freedom I could ever hope for, for in the arms of my master, one who doth care for me in ways others never could, whom I may serve well and satisfy, whom I may please and belong to, it is my only true happiness. To be commanded by that familiar voice which lets my heart sing, to serve one who understands my heart far better than I, and to please one so much is the only way I know to truly live._

_My master is more than simply one who commands and demands and compels. My master is one who understands my heart, and knows exactly what I need, when I need it, sometimes regardless of his own needs. Though he does command me and does punish me in the most glorious of fashions, he cares for me and takes care of my deepest needs in ways that only he knows. In a moment when others would leave me to my tears, only he would sit beside me and cloak me in his very essence, sheltering me from the pain that is this world. Though he commands my deeds and even thoughts, he also commands my heart to be strong and endure. His own strength and power becomes a part of me, and to submit to him is to become part of him, and he a part of me. It is to let his very life force infuse me with the strength he requires of me, to satisfy us both._

_Such care and love doth not go unrequited, for I repay my master far more than he asks of me. I do my very best to serve him, to satisfy him, and to make his life easier in anyway that I can. After a long hard day, he can be assured a warm bath, a hot meal and an open ear upon which he can vent his daily stresses. I enjoy soothing my master, and showing him how much he truly means to this lowly slave. I never allow his muscles to become tense, or his skin to be not moisturized, or his stomach empty for any length of time. I am akin to his eyes and ears, so that I may best serve his every need before he commands it, to save him time and trouble. I feel if my master must command me, then I have not been paying close enough attention to his needs, and need punishment for such gross neglect._

_If my body may be the best way for him to take out his anger, his fear, his anguish or his joy, then I am his vessel of vindication; his to do with as he sees fit. I know my master well and understand his need for me physically, and with this body I do worship my master, bending to his every whim and desire, satisfying him in any way he needs. If he doth need and I cannot comply, I feel I have betrayed him, and do not deserve him. I feel it is my duty as well as my mission to please him in every way, and if for any reason I cannot, I feel I have failed him. My master is one who deserves the very best, and if I cannot give him what he needs, a sorrow unlike any other in existence fills me. My own happiness revolves around my master’s, and if I cannot fulfill his desires, I am nothing._

_A slave is not just one who submits. A true slave binds themselves to their Master or Mistress, flesh of flesh, blood of blood, bone of bone. They are owned; they are property; they are part of the whole that is their Master or Mistress. They have no sole purpose, that much is certain. However, their main purpose is the happiness of their Master or Mistress. My Master understands this concept, and expects nothing less than all of me, and I give it freely, for in his arms only do I find the freedom my heart has longed for my whole life. I am a part of his whole, but it is he who makes me whole in return._

Bobby tried his best to remember to breathe. Every muscle in his body was taut and vibrating. The thought of Alexandra Eames pouring her heart and soul into such controlled frenzy sent his body racing. But the thought of her doing it to someone else had him seeing green. Did she still have a Master? Was she still bound to another, making him her focus every moment she was away from work?

No, he thought with a deep sigh. He’d already come to realize that she didn’t have anyone right now. There were no signs, no tokens, no pictures of anyone she might be interested in at the moment. But to have such an evocative view and such a complicated emotional stance on a position so many view as unhealthy, even dangerous! To think he’d laughed at her lack of a personal life!

A sudden thought struck him, one that both frightened and elated him. Would she accept him in such a way? Her deepest needs were made clear at last, in his hand in black and white. But could he do that for her? Could he ever truly be what she needed? He wanted to. He’d always wanted to, but this was so much more. This was so intimate. So much trust was needed…

Bobby stood from her couch as a singular notion struck him. He tamped down his teeming erection with every determined stride. As he grabbed his coat, he went over in his mind the fastest routes to the East Village.

End chapter 1

Ch. 2 Misadventures and New Insights

The city was a blur as the cab slowly made its way through traffic. Tea roses and Baby’s Breath still clung to his senses as he held the book to his chest. In his mind he was still trying to understand it all. So much to believe, that she would enjoy such things. His strong, intelligent, vibrant partner crying out in throngs while tied down and helpless, at the mercy of some sick freak. Yet, he wanted to be that sick freak. He wanted to see the look in her eyes, the same one he saw whenever they had to go in hot, guns ready. He needed to see that same look when she had to go with him into interrogation and run defense for him, even when she didn’t agree. He had to see that she trusted him, trusted him enough to let him touch her in this way.

He leaned against the cab window, cool glass and warm thoughts fading the city around him further…

_Dear God, it’s hot in here, but so is she. Look at her. Just LOOK at her! I did just what she wanted. She’s across my bed, softness holding her wrists and ankles; she’s spread and naked and oh heavens she’s moaning! Squirming, moaning, begging… calling for me. What can I do, Alex? How do I make it better for you? I don’t care what you tell me, I’ll do whatever you want. I want this to be perfect, but you already are. Skin so soft under my hands. Smooth. Stretch marks. War wounds, earned for the sacrifice you made. The pain. God I remember it, sweetheart. I’ll never forget. Don’t cry. Please don’t ever cry again. I’ll do anything you ask, but please don’t cry._

_She’s so soft all over! Just laying here next to her is making me insane! I was always insane, but now it’s official, and she made it so. Can I kiss you, Alex? Am I allowed? Should I? I don’t care! You taste like cinnamon, Alex. Cinnamon and sugar and home, soft and smooth and so warm. And getting hotter. That’s it, baby, scream for me. Let them hear you for miles, so the entire city will know I made you feel this way. So they’ll know you’re mine. And I’m yours…_

A horn just outside his window jolted him from his mind. His heart was pounding and sweat was beading across his face. His clothes felt damp and sticky, and there was an amazingly powerful ache pulsing against his jeans. This cab ride was officially taking forever.

Finally, he stepped out into the haze of this part of town, right in front of a place he’d had to enter only because a suspect shopped there. He hadn’t noticed it so much, then, but now he had a purpose. He was going to make use of this place. So into _Lady Gadiva’s Workshop_ walked Detective Robert Goren.

Toys for big boys, he thought as he wandered aimlessly through the many displays. Fuzzy and furry and leathery things surrounded him in colors not found in nature. Who the heck would actually use fuzzy pink handcuffs? They were soft, though…

“Hi. I’m Angel. Anything I can help you find?” Bobby gave a wonderful impression of a deer in headlights as he turned to behold a rather lovely young woman. She wore tight leather pants, but a rather modest cream-colored top. Her hair was a very dark brown, and her smile was genuine and subdued.

Then he remembered the fuzzy handcuffs in his hand, blushed quite deeply and dropped them very quickly.

“Pink not your color?”

“Uhm…” He could feel his cheeks growing hotter. What the hell was this? He wasn’t shy about much, but sex was not something he was ever shy about. It was natural, heart-felt, and why the hell was he trying to convince himself of this right now?!

“Oh, I see. First time?” At his very dumb nod, she smiled further. “Well, what interests you? I might be able to help you find what you need.”

“I’m actually here for s-some…um…b-bon…”

“Bondage? Is that the word you’re reaching for?” And suddenly it felt as if he was blushing all the way to his ankles, and her knowing smile wasn’t helping. “Follow me, then.” She turned on a surprisingly delicate ankle considering the boots she wore and moved toward the back of the store.

“Well, actually, I’m just sort of learning.” She stopped dead and turned to him fully, her arms across her chest and an air of authority suddenly surrounding her.

“Well, then you need to seriously consider what you’re getting yourself into.” He stared at her a moment, a hard swallow ripping through his parched throat. She licked her lips as if thoroughly annoyed. Wow, she looked a lot like…

“What do you really think this is?”

“Well, it’s about one person being in charge while the other person is at their mercy.” He didn’t think, and perhaps he should have, because even _he_ thought that answer was lame, and untrue. At least for him. Was it? Did he even know what he thought?

“It’s not so much about dominance, but sharing.” Bobby stepped back, his fantasy suddenly alive in his mind again. Wow, that sounded familiar. “A sharing of yourself with someone else in a specific kind of setting. For some, that means being on ‘top’ as opposed to on ‘bottom’, and for others, it is simply a state of mind, allowing control to be given and taken as a situation dictates.”

“Wow. I’m impressed. ” He couldn’t help a smile as the cynic in him reared its head. “That sounded remarkably well rehearsed.” With a smirk of her own, she relaxed a bit, her arms falling to her side. Resignation? Annoyance? Both?

“Yeah, I can see that you really are new to this whole thing. Come back and let me explain a few things to you.” She stretched up and looked over his shoulder, and he turned to follow her line of sight. “Julia, take over for a few, could you?” Talking to nothing? Should he really be taking advice from this woman?

“You got it.” From behind one of the display cases came a diminutive slip of a girl in a schoolgirl’s outfit, high-heeled Mary Jane shoes and fishnet stockings. Her hair was in pig-tails, and she wore far too much eye make-up. A leach’s dream. He sincerely hoped that was her goal.

Angel turned and walked to the back of the store, a curtain of crushed velvet covering a doorway. She moved behind it, and he followed, not entirely sure if he should. Point of no return, and all that. _I really hope this drama-queen streak does dormant soon,_ he thought as he stepped beyond.

He looked around in the dimmed light, and the walls were covered in nightmarish things. Whips, chains, many kinds f knives, handcuffs of all assortments, rope and leather bindings. He was suddenly not sure if he was in for a lecture or a demonstration.

“Come, sit.” She advanced on a small table, rather out of place considering the surroundings. Kind of like her, he thought with a wolfish grin. The small wooden table held a white linen tablecloth and a small vase with a single pink carnation, freshly bloomed. The chairs were hard but comfortable, and within seconds she brought forth a small ceramic tea set.

“Now, where exactly did you get the idea to get into this? It sounds like it wasn’t your first choice.”

“Well, there’s this woman in my life, not really a girlfriend per say, she’s a friend that I kind of have a thing for.” Oh yeah, that sounded _really_ lame. Need to curb that. “And she asked me to get her something from her apartment, and I stumbled onto this…well, let me show you.” He retrieved the book and the two small sheets of paper that were currently ruling his life. As she read them over, his mind drifted back to his fantasy. _Soft skin, pleading eyes. I’ll do anything, baby, just tell me you want me to, tell me you like it, let me know you love it when I touch you right here…_

“That’s very personal. It’s also very, very good that you read this.” His mind snapped back to the present just in time to retrieve the pages and return them to the book. The book lay out on the table, and Bobby suddenly felt like snatching it up and keeping it in his coat. Alex should never be so exposed. She should be protected, cherished, not left out on display like a piece of meat. Angel’s smile changed subtly, and he wanted to adopt his usual stone face of indifference, but it seemed too late. “It shows you’re willing to accept this part of her. You’re willing to understand and even venture toward enjoying this part of her personality. You just got knocked up two notches in my book.” She handed him a small cup, steam roiling from the rim. “Sugar?”

“No, thank you.” She sat back easily in her chair, taking her own cup and staring at him through slightly lidded, thoughtful eyes. Yup, far too late to try and cover this. Oh well.

“So,” she said after a brief sip of the strong brew, “what did you have planned?”

“Still working on that.” Never mind the fact that he was already trying to tune out Alex’s moaning in his head. Why was this fantasy not joining the others that involved his partner in seclusion so he could think?

“Ever even thought about this before?”

“Yes, but my knowledge has only gone as far as surface research. I’ve seen some very interesting things, and some things that seemed anything but pleasurable.”

“Pleasure is in the eye of the beholder, but she’s given you a really great outline on what she is and is not comfortable with. But word of warning, whatever you end up doing, you have to stick to these guidelines.”

“Well, she also said she wanted to explore.” She nodded, almost as if testing him. He’d passed, apparently.

“True, but think about it this way. This is your first encounter, not only sexually, but also in this setting. The last thing she is going to want is to be pushed out of her comfort zone. Enough new territory is being forged here without adding in something that could potentially ruin this entire thing.”

“Point taken.” Another soft smirk fades in and out. Apparently, he was getting some of this right.

“Good. Next up, do you have any idea what her safe word could be?”

“Safe word?” His ears gently perked. Her smile faltered a bit, and she set her cup aside.

“Ok, how exactly do you think the person on top knows when the person on bottom has had enough?”

“I hadn’t really… thought about that.” Not totally true, but that was neight here nor there.

“Well, while the telepathic skills of Hollywood actors may be uncanny, those of us in the real world use words. Special words or phrases that, if uttered, stop the game right then and there. Ropes and bonds are removed, blindfolds are off. The person on bottom has control of when things stop in this sense, because only they can know when they truly can’t take anymore. This word is their lifeline. Honor it as a matter of trust, always.”

“I take it you’re not a big believer in gags, then.”

“Not really. They cut off communication. And besides, most people like to listen to the begging.” Her nose gave an impish crinkle. Little minx, he thought with a slow sip.

“You sound like you know all there is to know about this stuff.”

“I’m part of the local chapter of a BDSM educational group. Working here for as long as I have, it made sense to know what my customers were up to.”

“But not you?”

“That’s none of your business either way.” Even though he already had his answer, but no matter.

“Returning to the subject at hand, if you want to really impress her, get informed. Tell me you didn’t do something stupid like plan something for tonight?”

“I barely even _have_ a plan.”

“Good, because now I can truly devote time to you and make sure you make the most of this.” With that she was on her feet and walking, and Bobby had to consciously keep up with her. She went rather ceremoniously back through the velvet curtain and into the store, weaving her way through the maze of aisles.

“Did you have particular scene in mind?”

“Scene?”

“Absolutely. This is primarily about role-playing, and this girl of yours seems to like that part of it especially, so why not have a full scene? You can set it up in your apartment, and when you bring her there, all you have to do is change clothes and make it happen. Or hell, leave changing out of it. You can do that, too.”

“Good idea.”

“Well, let’s go see if we can’t get you a few more good ideas.”

She stood for a moment before a display of all things feathery and soft, and began picking up what looked like no more than yards of silk. One after another was shoved at him in a barrage of dark colors and patterns. As she moved on, he surveyed his armful in more detail.

“But, what are these for?”

“You’re lady friend seems to like restraints a lot.” Made sense. He hadn’t liked the idea of ropes. They seemed…too mean. Too angry. Unloving.

“Good. No ropes.”

“I quite agree. Even in a situation like this where one of you is experienced, soft and simple makes all the difference.” And another point scored, he thought happily. He was on a roll, and forming a definite plan.

“Anything else you’d like?”

“Actually, yes….” He made his way to a second display, and her giggle behind him seemed distant. He knew what he was looking for, and when he found it, he found two other things that would go perfectly with it.

“You have some…interesting tastes.” He looked back toward her as he held up two of the objects he wanted.

“I fell like I’m back in high school having ‘the talk.’ This one’s a little more hands-on, though.” Again rose the cynic, but at least his sense of humor was coming back, too.

“In a way, you are.” She held up a pair of bottles, and an impish grin of his own spread wide.

“Well, looks like you’ve got what you need.” She turned toward halfway in the direction of the counter, but a sudden grin told him mischief was about. “So, how did you want to present the subject to her?”

“I hadn’t gotten to that part yet.”

“Well, then I have a few suggestions…”

End chapter 2

**Ch.** ** 3 A Sudden Reversal of Fortune**

“All right, this will be here in the morning.” Alex was brought out of the haze that had been her thoughts by the sound of her partner’s voice. Before she could fully react, the pen she’d been tapping on her notepad had been stripped from her grasp, replaced by his hand pulling her to her feet.

“Bobby, what?” He loved catching her off guard, but this was truly priceless. He couldn’t have asked for better. She was a bit mentally exhausted after that last case and needed distraction, and that was perfect considering what he had planned for tonight.

“Come on. We need dinner and a movie. Right now.”

“Seriously, I’m not-” Not that he was going to be swayed, she knew. He had that look, that rare smile that said he wanted to break away for a minute. What could have brought this on? “Now?”

“You are, and right now.” His eyes sparkled with something that on any other person could only constitute mischief. That tore it for her. She had her coat in hand before he got back to his side of the desk. Out of character, out of line, and slightly out of his mind. This was going to be an evening not to be missed.

“All right, who are you and what have you done with my partner?”

“Don’t you know?” He said with all the innocence he could muster. He even managed an almost petulant pout. “Bandits came and took your real partner. I’m his evening replacement.”

“Ah. So what should I expect from my new partner for the evening?” Games? Since when did Bobby Goren play games, outside of the interrogation room? This was a day to get reacquainted with her diary, of that Alex was becoming very certain.

“Not much different from the usual. Just dinner, a movie, and maybe an evening of actual relaxation as opposed to just taking your work home and doing it there as opposed to at the office.” He held open the elevator door for her like a true knight in shining armor. So why did that last comment sting so much?

“Ok, sometimes it’s a little scary how well you know me.” If you only knew, sweet one, he thought as he pressed the button for the basement parking garage.

“You’d be surprised all the things I know about you, Alex.” She doubted that highly, but this was his night. Let him think what he wanted. Besides, she was far more interested in what he would do next.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“I swear, what is it with women and enormous purses?” It was the only thing that wanted to come out of his mouth as he opened the door to his apartment. Alex had insisted on bringing this ginormous duffel with her upstairs, mumbling something about ‘needing it’. He half-wondered if it was ‘that time of the month’, but considering how close he’d been in tagging her cycle the past six months (it gave him something to do to keep his mind off the rest of her inhumanly gorgeous body), he figured 3 to 1 that all was clear and safe. So, why the bag?

“Something for every occasion, I guess.” As she moved past him and set down the bag that could double as a carry-on, he turned away to hide his smile and lock all three locks on his front door. All things to plan, he was quite certain it wouldn’t be opening again anytime this evening. Or half the morning, if he was lucky.

He dropped the bags of dinner on the coffee table and retrieved two beers and two plates from the kitchen. Upon returning, he found Alex in her customary spot on the couch, passing out white boxes as she went. He settled in next to her and turned on the TV right on time. Familiar music and one man’s voice filled the quiet living room.

“Red Shoe Diaries? You actually watch this?” Alex broke apart her chopsticks and all but stared at the TV, trying to figure out if this was an episode she’d seen before.

“Of course. It’s a very interesting study in human sexual psychology and mating practices.” He all but dove into his beef and broccoli, knowing he would need all the strength he could get together for tonight.

“Research. Everything with you is research.” The same tolerant exasperation he’d come to love in her. As she threw her hair back and sat back to enjoy the meal, he hoped she wouldn’t see the VCR running.

“Well, this is a treat, really. It shows the more primal, baser needs and desires, much like we see in our cases. But while the cases we see are more toward the violent, vindictive, dominating side of the mind, this is more the emotional and physically fulfilling side.” Alex licked a single chopstick as she pondered, and Bobby had to consciously keep from staring and from being jealous of a piece of wood. He had his own to deal with, after all. A problem he could thankfully hide with a single, well-played bent leg.

“I don’t think they intended it that way, Bobby.” She looked over at him. He looked comfortable, for once. This truly was a new side of her partner. Mildly carefree, relaxed, enjoying a meal and a study in human sexual customs. Sometimes she had to remind herself that he had a sex, let alone that he participated in the act. Then again, the parade of brunettes he’d seen him go through over their partnership, not to mention the looks he doesn’t mind getting when they have to work undercover and he wears that jeans that make his ass look positively delicious, made it difficult to forget. “You _do_ know this show is scripted right?”

“Yes.”

“Ok, just checking.”

“What, you wondered? You thought I actually believed this was real on some level?” Before she could answer, a fortune cookie struck her soundly in the shoulder. She looked down at the offending object, wanting nothing more than to retaliate with a soy sauce packet, unopened of course. And she would have, if she hadn’t looked up to see him poised with a crab Rangoon ready to fly. She could only smile.

“Do it and die, Poncho Via.”

“Promises, promises,” he moaned as he popped half of his artillery piece into his mouth. Again, he was simply relaxed. She wondered how often this truly happened. It had always bothered her that he got so wrapped up in his work that he would actually be caught sleeping at his desk because he didn’t bother to go home. Rumor had it that he kept a second suit in his locker downstairs in the basement just to make sure he didn’t have to go home if he’d pulled another all-night at the office. Now he seemed calm, even peaceful as he watched… a show about sex. A man after all. And a handsome one, too. She wondered how much ‘relaxation’ it would take her this weekend to make up for having to be so close to him when he was this… stimulating.

Alex shook her head slightly, rounding her thoughts up and out of the realm of…_that_. Wow, that wasn’t quite the road she wanted to take that particular thought down…

Her mental ramblings were suddenly refocused at the sound of a rather hoarse cry. The TV glowed against the unlit wall as she watched a tall, curvy redhead stretched out on a thickly linened bed. She was handcuffed to the bedposts, looked like a four-poster, and she was being stared at by a man wearing nothing but his birthday suit. He stood over her, appreciating her, and suddenly the scene struck home. Alex knew this episode! She loved this episode! She had it taped at home, as a matter of fact…

“And for the sake of argument, the violent and the fulfilling can be much more closely tied in certain situations.” There it is, he thought with a smile he could barely suppress. He knew that TV guide was going to come in handy someday. Not to mention keeping cable even though he was never home enough to enjoy it.

“Example?” A well-muscled hand came down the throat of the woman moaning on the other side of the coffee table.

“Watch. Even though she’s tied to the bedposts, she’s still very actively participating in what’s happening. Not to mention that she’s liking it.” The young woman writhed shamelessly, moving against the hand that touched her, begging for more without words.

“You know she’s an actress being paid for this, right?”

“Hollywood or your own backyard, this kind of thing happens in real like too.” The dim light gave way to a moving light source. A candle. Alex liked this part. She’d had to tape this episode again because she enjoyed this part so much she’d worn out the first taping. “Also, there’s very little pain involved. See, like this.” A single drop landed on her skin, and she writhed like her life depended on it. Across her stomach, down to the joining of her legs, and across her silky panties, wax dripped a trail down her body. “The dropping of candle wax is a very good way to pinpoint a location on the body for concentrated sensation.”

“Sounds messy.” Not that he wouldn’t love to try it, he thought as he finished off the last of the almond cookie he’d been nursing since he’d finished his meal. Maybe this TV thing wasn’t such a great opener. He was having mild difficulty keeping his body at bay. And her damnable perfume wasn’t helping!

“So is sex, when you think about it.”

“Point taken.” And with that she went back to watching the scene before them.

Dead end. Ouch. Well, Casanova, are you planning on moving this along or what? He had to do something to start this damned thing. Too bad he wasn’t coming up with… oh, now _that’s_ just too good. Down came a single hand to skin, and the woman groaned in perfect pleasure. Fabric swished across fabric as the weight n the couch changed slightly. Did Alex just shift? Was she liking this? Then now’s as good a time as any.

“Sorry. I just can’t see how tying someone down and doing things against their will would give someone pleasure of any kind.” Alex reeled in her seat, almost turning completely towards him. Had he been too forward? He gestured as he usually did, trying to make it seem conversational. “And referring to someone as ‘Master’ or ‘Mistress’? Don’t you think it’s a little degrading?”

“A bit closed-minded, aren’t you?” Uh oh, better cover that.

“Not at all, I just have a hard time wrapping my mind around the concept of pain being pleasurable.” He turned slightly in his seat, much more interested in the beauty next to him than the nameless face on TV.

“I swear, Bobby, sometimes you are the most straight laced person on the planet.” If by ‘straight’ she meant he liked girls, and by ‘laced’ he liked her, a girl, and the thought of lace, then she’d hit her mark square on. Was she ever in for a surprise!

“Besides,” she went on, “who said anything about pain? Other things can be used in these types of situations that truly are…stimulating.” Bobby had to bite his cheek to keep from biting his lip or letting his tongue grace across them. Did she have to be so gorgeous when she’s defensive?

“Tying someone down seems way too much like forcing to seem consensual.” She faced him fully now, the TV long forgotten.

“Not only is it consensual, some people really love it.” Something tingled along that voice, and for just a moment his conscious, rational mind decided to take a short hike.

“Would you be willing to test that theory, Alex?” Alex eyes popped before shifting back down to being practically scandalized.

“I beg your pardon?” And it’s a line drive out to deep left field, folks! Can Goren get under it? Yes, it’s going…going…

“Well, you seem so bent on your thinking, and I just can’t get my head around it. You’d really have to convince me as to the validity of this kind of theory, Alex.” He watched her through heavily lidded eyes, masking desire in contemplation, and half hoping half fearing she would see right through it.

“Very well.” And he caught it! Oh yes! How the heck did he manage to get this lucky? Ok, he had to calm down; he had to keep it together.

“All right,” he said getting more comfortable and making sure to hide his still very present erection, “explain to me the thinking behind willingly going through pain for the pleasure of a partner and you yourself finding that same act pleasurable.”

“I can explain that easily enough.” She rose slowly from her seat and faced him, a true look of defiance on her face. She switched off the TV by remote, thankfully ignoring the VCR. Oh, this was going to be so much fun.

“Oh, but before I begin, one thing?” He lifted a single eyebrow, believing himself ready for anything. Her soft smile sent shivers down his spine that he was quite pleased he was able to hide.

“Bobby,” she started, her voice dropping down to what could only be described as a purr dipped in warm chocolate to obviously begin a lengthy- “exactly when did you think I wrote those essays you read about myself?”

End chapter 4

Ch. 4 All Bets Are Off

Then again, maybe not. For a split second, he lost all the façade he’d worked so hard for and stared in mid-range shock at his partner. His stomach felt like a lead weight had just been unceremoniously dropped into it, and his heart took a temporary leave. An instant later he was back under control, but still scrambling for something –anything!- to redirect this sudden wrinkle.

“I’m sorry?” He croaked like a half-dead frog.

“You’re a little too predictable sometimes, Bobby. I knew that when I asked you to get my overnight bag, you’d somehow find your way to my desk and then to my book. And I didn’t even have to leave it out.” Her words were laced with song and spice. That voice was going to be the death of him, Minx that she was. His brain tried almost painfully to right itself. He was supposed to be the smart one! Why the hell hadn’t he seen this coming?! _Oh, right. Alex and the idea of sex were involved. Nevermind._

“How is that, do you think?” He watched as she sauntered toward his door, somehow knowing that she wasn’t going to leave. Or was that just wishful thinking?

“Because I knew you’d snoop. I knew you’d find it if I left it in the right place. I also knew you’d be so focused on these new ideas in your head…” She reached out and into his hung coat, retrieving the small leather bound volume that still held a hint of Baby’s Breath, “…that you’d completely forget to put my book back.” Ouch. _Ladies and gentleman, we have officially declared this situation a train wreck. Please act accordingly._

“But for the moment, let’s continue that discussion about pain versus pleasure, shall we?” _Ummm…._

“If you’d like…” He really hoped he didn’t sound as bad as he thought he did. He shifted on the couch as she slowly made her way back to face him. A leg automatically crossed over his lap just enough to hide a problem rapidly receding, despite his best efforts. So much for plans.

“To begin, as I’m sure you’ve surmised, I’m very well acquainted with this concept.” As she spoke, she began pacing just on the other side of his coffee table. And with every swing of her luscious hips, Bobby’s already jangled mind tried to find something other than her to focus on. Like her curious lack of a panty line, for instance…

“I have been a dominatrix for several years, since college, actually. It was quite a shock when my freshman roommate came home one night and proceeded to empty her bag onto her bed. It was filled with floggers and restraints and all kinds of lovely toys. I should have been repulsed. Instead, I got involved.” She turned suddenly, snapping Bobby’s attention from her ass to her eyes and promptly offsetting his brain. “Questions?”

“Have you ever…you know...let someone…” Ok, articulation was out of the question.

“Restrain me? No. I was always in charge, and eventually, that got one person’s attention. My ‘trainer’.”

“So you were trained. You didn’t…experiment.” And what he wouldn’t give to be her sexual guinee pig.

“Experimentation is key, but I understood some possibilities and wanted to make sure I didn’t do anything harmful, and I knew nothing about what the scene itself was about, so I sought help. Hank showed me the ropes, so to speak, and he also taught me that it truly is all in the wrist. You have no idea how much that helped me in Vice.” Hank. Once again the thought of another man touching his Alex had Bobby’s blood boiling. She had to have seen that because her soft lips curled into a devilish grin. And suddenly he was thankful his leg had taken initiative because he once again had quite a bit to hide and not a lot of brain to work with.

“So, you kept doing it after college.”

“Off and on, but we’ll get to that. Hank also made something very clear early on, when I was still getting way too excited about the prospect of being in charge. In a way, he’s what made me really want to become a cop.” Bobby made a mental note to find this man and thank him before he skinned him.

“He showed me another side of being dominant: being attentive. He told me to write those essays, to ensure that I understood what it was like to trust and be trusted.” Trust. Such a small word, yet it was still the one part of himself he’d never let anyone near, let alone committed to anyone. Well, she wasn’t anyone, now was she?

“Now, if I know you, you had a few things here and there to ensure-aha!” Glassy eyes barely focused as Bobby’s keener than usual ears registered the crinkle of brown paper and plastic inner wrappings. He didn’t have to look up to know he’d been found. “That they would be right where you wanted them when the time came. Let’s see… My, my, such interesting choices. Why, Bobby,” she said as she looked up, a tiny sparkle in her gorgeous tawny eyes, “I had no idea you enjoyed such a thing.” She peered down a second time, and for that second he felt like he was the one under the microscope. Did she like the things he chose? Would she-

“On second thought, we’ll get to these later.” She dropped the bag next to hers by the door. Somehow, it sounded distinctly like his doom. He blinked, and suddenly she stood before him. His gaze drug from her bare feet up her stocking-covered legs to the power-suit skirt to that blouse nowhere near as creamy as her skin. She dropped so perfectly to her knees he barely registered it. His heart had taken up residency in his stomach as soft hands began a slow massage of his knees.

“Remember what I said about being attentive, Bobby?” He nodded dumbly, not trusting his voice. “Well, it means a lot of things.” Her hands traveled up his thighs softly. He was certain if he gripped the fabric of this couch any harder, it would shred. Or he would. Her touch ran evenly past his groin and up his stomach, her body nestling between his further spread legs. Her breath was suddenly close enough to feel, her hands playing with his collar as he swallowed hard.

“It means that this is for both of us, and I intend for both of us to enjoy every moment.” His collar button popped open. Her nimble fingers worked down his shirt until it fell open. She jerked forward, bringing both of them to their feet. His shirt fell away, and he watched in awe as she looked him over with approval.

“Oh yes, you’ll do just fine.” Bobby’s heart went into humming bird mode as her hands worked at his waist, releasing and pulling loose his belt. She held it up as if to scrutinize, and his blood ran cold. She wasn’t going to…?

“On your knees, Robert.” That hammered through his mind in a different voice all together. He couldn’t help but follow, even as memories buried deep decided now would be a good time to resurface. _Damn them. Damn them all._ A single tiny foot pushed him backward and into the couch. Falling of a whole different nature came to the forefront, his throat suddenly dry. A shadow cast across his face, and his eyes opened to behold not a tormentor, but a fantasy.

“Do you trust me, Robert?” His eyes shot to hers, wide and begging in a way they hadn’t in decades. She nodded once and knelt before him, his face softly cradled in her hands.

“I have to ask. Do you trust me to know what you need when you need it? Do you trust me to provide for those needs in whatever form they come?” He couldn’t help leaning into her touch. He wanted to touch her so much it hurt, but he didn’t dare. He only nodded.

“Say it, Robert.”

Parched and broken, the words whispered forth. “I trust you, Alex.”

“Then you know you don’t have to be afraid.” _Not of her. Not of her. _The words kept chanting through his head like the deep seated mantra they were as she reached for him, fear and lust thick enough to smell radiating from him in waves of anticipation. Soft fingers touched his face, as if making sure he was still real.

“Oh dear. I think I broke him.” And in so few words the bubble of tension burst inside him. She was so good at that, he wondered how he ever made it through his day without her. Wait. He’d tried that. And it had nearly cost the department the worst rookie he’d ever seen. Not that it would have been such a big loss, but no matter.

“For this evening, considering your lack of experience,” she said looping the belt around the leg of the couch, “I’ll allow for a lot of talking. You can tell me what’s good and what’s not.” The belt cinched tight, but not enough to really hurt him. He could feel quickly that if he really wanted to, he could get free. “But just remember who you’re talking to, understood?” Behind that almost feral grin stood a woman unyielding. Oh no, there was no mistaking who she was. Or where he was: beneath her, before her, and at her mercy.

“So, have you ever done anything like this before?” His head shook dumbly, every roll making his already thick head dizzy.

“Then it will be my pleasure to show you…” a kiss to his temple, “…just how lovely…” a kiss to the hollow of his throat, “…this can be.” A final swipe of her tongue across one dark brown nipple sent shivers down his spine and rocketing to his already aching erection.

“By the way, Robert, what roll were you going to play in this little rendezvous of yours?”

“I was…” He could breathe. Fancy that. “I was going to follow the letters…” At her raised eyebrow, he sucked in a shuddering breath. “Mistress.”

“Very good. Interesting, too. For your honesty, I’ll let you take the lead for a moment, just to see how you like it.” She rose onto her haunches, silken hair tickling his chest. “Tell me what you’d like me to take off, and if you ask properly, I’ll do as you ask. With the provision,” she said running her hands lovingly through her hair, “that you just get to watch.” She stood before him positively beaming with pride. And she had good reason to be. She was as close to physically perfect as any woman could ever be. Bobby had always enjoyed touching his lovers. Being in charge never really entered into it, he just enjoyed pleasing them. Making them feel special, sensual, and most of all sexy. But Alex didn’t need that. She knew she was sexy. She knew she was special. She just didn’t know how special…

“And if you forget yourself, clothes go back on. If I get back to square one, the game is over.” Cruelty, thy name is Mistress. She smiled down at him as a wolf would over a lamb, and he had to fight to swallow. Wrinkle turned train wreck turned ‘oh my god, she’s going to eat me alive’. _Memo: Make a point to reevaluate the establishment of current situation when brain returns to normal functioning status. Memo saved. Switching off rational function… now._

“The sh-shirt.” At one raised eyebrow, he grunted in frustration. _Idiot. Pay attention!_

“Please take off your blouse, Mistress.” The smile bloomed across her face, lighting the room.

“Much better. There’s hope for you yet.” Without another word she set to her task, beginning at her collar and tackling the button. Slowly. Way too slowly, Bobby thought as nimble fingers gently released the first button, revealing the soft skin beneath. Each button gave way to more and more delicious flesh, something black and lacey showing through the folds of fabric. At last the last button was undone, and his control was rapidly following. She pulled the shirt apart, and he couldn’t hold in the gasp. Perfectly toned curves, rounded and soft came to his eyes as white satin fell to the floor. He could have sat there for hours taking her in, but his thoughts wandered back to the moment he’d almost creamed himself at his desk when staring at her just like this.

“The skirt next, please, M-Mistress…” Small hand and delicate fingers trailed over her body, gently caressing her in all the ways he wished he could just then. Down and down and down they went, small gasps echoing as she hits the right spots. His photographic memory kicked over, and with every move she made he cataloged her reaction, memorizing the sight of her so his hands would know their way when he finally got to touch her.

And then her skirt was gone. He wasn’t really sure how that had happened, but he didn’t care. Not only was she wearing a black lace garter and stockings to match her bra, but no panties. She’d gone the entire day wearing no panties. He groaned aloud as his hips moved, squirming to relax some of the pressure of his now painful erection.

A sound came to his ears just then. A soft, helpless kind of whimpering sound. And he was stunned to discovery he was making it. Alex smiled as she got down on her knees just beyond his feet. Her hands touched the floor on either side of his calves, her entire body on display for him. She smiled so sweetly. Why wouldn’t she kiss him with that smile? Who was in charge again?

“I think it’s time I taught you a thing or two about controlling yourself, Robert.” Oh, that’s right. She was in charge. IS. _Alex…_

That thought was striped from him as hot breath flashed across his chest, her tongue sweeping over one hard nipple. His flesh ignited, hot bolts of pleasure streaking through him and settling low, loving the way she rubbed against what felt like his entire body. He lay fixed, bathing in the glow of her, lost in the tide she caused to ebb and flow. His throat felt like sandpaper when he tried to speak.

“Should I… be doing something, Mistress?”

“You are, Robert.” Velvety warmth filled in the gaps in his head as she purred. He was pleasing her. She liked this. He’d honestly never thought that he could be on this end of things, but this was Alex. His Goddess. His Mistress. _My Lover._

“Hmmm. I think you may be wearing too much. Time to even the score, don’t you think?” Delicate fingers moved with firm determination across his stomach, and he was suddenly very glad he’d put himself through hell all his life to keep in shape. Nothing but perfection was worthy of this Goddess. Who knew him so well. Who instinctively knew he liked to be touched right-

“Ah!” Her hot, wet tongue darted in and out of his navel as her hands splayed over his hips. Warmth pressed against his legs and groin, causing him to squirm all the more.

“Robert,” she said between perfect bolts of pleasure, “you keep squirming like that, you’ll throw me right off. You’re so much bigger than I am. I could get hurt if you did that.” Instantly he froze, and his own lack of movement only added to the sensation, because now he knew it was just her. Touching him, tasting him, teasing his skin as she pulled his clothes away. Nails raked across his skin, leaving tiny paths of red sensation in their wake. They trailed down his sides slowly, gently… a hard smack to each flank rocked him. The soft cotton of his boxers was damp, and he was half-embarrassed. He hadn’t been this hot since he was a teenager, and even then, nothing could compare to this insanity. Nails grazed as the waistband was pulled away, and at last his cock sprang free. His legs were suddenly free, then clasped between her slender thighs, her fingers running just up his hardened shaft.

“My, my. All this for little ol’ me? Why, thank you, Robert.” He bucked without meaning to. And then her hands were gone, replaced by her strong fingers teasing their way up his arms to his wrists, her warm body stretched across his, igniting every inch of flesh she touched.

His already teeming erection brushed the scorching place where she straddled him, yanking a harsh gasp from his throat. _Oh god, Alex. Hurt me. Break me. Do anything you want, just make me yours. _“Please…”

“Please what, Robert?”

“Please, Mistress…”

“Mmmm… I like the sound of that. For being such a good boy, you get what you want.” He whimpered in dismay as she lifted off his body, only to groan as she took his cock in her hand. Nine inches cradled lovingly, she took full stock of his weight and shape. “Lovely…” He barely heard her as she moved him, her legs stretching her body high above him as she reared. For a moment, she simply loomed over him, her sweet perfection on display for his hungry eyes. And mouth. And hands. And none could touch her. Sweet witch.

And then she touched him. Hot, slick with her juices, his tip touched her. And he went into orbit.

“Isn’t it nice to get what you want, Robert?” His eyes rolled back into his head, never to return as she sank onto him so slowly. Was she _kidding??_

“Yes, Mistr-ah!-Mistress…” Her hips rested against him, her entire weight supported as she sighed so deeply he could actually feel it. Twitch. Swirl. Dear God, this woman…

“And am I what you want Bobby?” Something deep inside her moved, and his hips shot upward, impaling her just that little bit further. She flew forward and down, and for a moment he panicked. But only a moment. Instantly she was back up, her weight holding him down as he squirmed beneath her, desperate for something-anything!

“Yes…” _More than life itself. Oh yes, just like that!_ “Oh, God, yes…”

“Yes what, Robert?” But she never stopped doing that insane thing deep inside her.

“Please, Mistress…” His hips bucked again, sending her along for the ride as sweet pleasure shot through him. “Oh, please don’t stop, Mistress!”

She smiled that perfect, pouty smile and started really moving. Gently, slowly at first, rising almost totally off him, before coming down hard and fats, sheathing him in pure Heaven. He pulled harshly against the binding that held him, hard enough to move the couch, but he didn’t care. Her rhythm was slow and even, racheting him up the mountain of pleasure he’d been running toward all night. He matched her from beneath, heels digging into the floor to get any kind of leverage. She barely had to work as he thrust hard into her, increasing the speed at the behest of their mixing moans.

“Oh, yes, Robert…” He’d hated that name, but on her lips it was more than wondrous. As was she. She rocked and lolled as her hair spilled over her shoulders, the couch dragging and creaking as he pulled hard on stiff fabric-

A harsh gasp and wince brought him squarely out of his haze as her nails dug into his stomach. He held stock still, her harsh breath the only breathing to be had. The panic returned in full force, every inch of him aching. Thoughts ran unbidden and unchecked as he tried to read her through the ruddy haze she’s dropped him in. _Oh no, she’s hurt! I hurt her! She’s going to hate me! Knew I should have been more careful! She’ll never want to do this again! I can’t believe I ever wanted to hurt you, Alex. I couldn’t, no matter what happened. I have no right…_

Delicate fingers caught his nipples and squeezed, hard. He yelped, the pain running along the lightning flash of pleasure, but he couldn’t pull away, his mind caught in the crosshairs. _Yes, Alex, hurt me. Make me pay for thinking I could hurt you. I can’t. I won’t! Not ever!_

“Did I tell you to stop, Robert?” Her voice was caught somewhere between gasp and groan, and it surged his body anew, but he couldn’t shake the uneasiness.

“I… thought I hurt you...” he gasped out.

“Did I tell you to think?” His eyes locked with hers, hot and hard.

“You don’t stop unless I tell you. You don’t fear unless I tell you. You do not feel guilt unless I tell you.” A single buck of her hips was all the order he needed. He moved again, rapidly gaining the momentum he’d had before, her body pulling him further into her sweet paradise. His eyes focused at last, the sight before him mesmerizing. Alex, sweet, beautiful Alex sheened in sweat and positively keening her pleasure. Her beauteous form clouded over as tears glistened his eyes. No fear. No pain. Just her… He could feel her reaching for her peak, and he let go of everything to let her feel as he did, even for just a moment. _Love you so much…_ His head fell back against the hard floorboards, and his world shattered, his body staked out on the rack of their shared desires.

The sound of his name across those coveted lips echoed in his clouded mind. He came back to himself to a sweet weight sprawled upon his heaving chest. Her hair flowed across his skin, her breath hot and flowing over him in soft waves. He could have stayed there forever. Eternity proved all too short.

He felt her stretch over him, and then his arms were free. They hurt to move, but he managed to move them down enough to drape over her back as she settled onto his chest. The feel and sound of her breathing was all that filled his mind for several lovely moments, which was a switch for him. Usually his mind was racing, especially after sex.

“Bobby?”

“It wasn’t what I expected.” He wasn’t sure what he’d expected, to tell the truth, but after the lecture about responsibility and the actual fun of picking out goodies, nothing had been used. Only her hands. “Well, it wasn’t…” Her soft, strong, knowing little hands… “It wasn’t quite like those letters.”

“Those were meant for someone who isn’t you.” Her voice was suddenly serious, and it compelled his attention, even though his neck wasn’t too pleased about moving just yet. He sought and found her almost golden eyes, so full he had to swallow back the tightness in his throat. “I don’t want you to be a slave to me, Bobby. You’re my partner, my friend. I care about you more than anything else in this world. And this is whatever we choose it to be.”

“Ok.” _Then I choose to be whatever you need, whatever you want. I choose to be with you, in any way I can be. Always._ “In that case,” he said with an infectious smile she’d never get tired of seeming, “why don’t you show me what some of those things in that bag are good for?”

THE END


End file.
